Provocations

By pbobby

How Do You Feel Now?

(May 23, 2002)

I remember December 7, 1941 like it was yesterday. I recall my fear of those "slant-eyed heathens" who bombed my country about noon Central Standard Time. I was nearly eight years old, and my imagination was racing away with visions of ghastly events that were sure to come soon. I was scared that it would not be long before they would be bombing my home in Lone Oak, Kentucky. Then my fear became more personal when my brother, Jack, joined the Navy and sailed out to sea to fight for our freedom. Now we have terrorists in our own country ready to go at the blink of an Arab.

A momentary digression.

And Yes! This was a time in American History when ninety + percent of Americans were patriotic and believed in God and freedom for all. Much time has passed, and much of the enthusiasm for both God and Country has waned. Today, many disgruntled Americans have banded together to attack our government, even to the point of founding militias and arming themselves for war. They do not like the restraints of law, and have worked systematically to build hate and anger into the very souls of their members. This condition alone is enough to cause great alarm amongst the rest of us. We should be vigilant and willing to fight those who would destroy us from the inside.

The ruthless political deals of our elected officials with big business can bankrupt our national treasury. Newly elected congressmen get there with a sizable indebtedness to various groups, and if they want to be re-elected, bigger deals for the state they represent and their wealthy supporters are mandatory. Maybe term limits would provide us with less graft. I think this corruption helped to initiate hatred toward our government, as did the assassinations of John F. Kennedy, Robert F. Kennedy, and Martin L. King. Organized Crime families have done us great harm for decades.

(Please excuse my momentary digression.)

It seems that every day the TV stations show us new atrocities and call it the news. We see the results of Palestinian suicide bombers killing as many Jews as possible. Then we are shown the results of Israeli retaliations to even the score. Then Israel pulls its troops back only to see the cycle of death and slaughter repeat itself again and again. No one knows how many of these two enemies will have to die before peace has a chance to be born.

Now, I am shaken again (by 9/11) out of my reasonably secure inner mind. We all know that many terrorists are in our country today and intend to attack our land and people with a/in a coordinated, nationwide manner when they are ready. The onslaught of such may begin before I complete this Provocation. If not now, it will come soon with a vengeance like a blanket of terror over our whole land.

The number of dead will most likely exceed the total killed in the 9/11 bombing of the Towers and the Pentagon. First the shock of having Armageddon occurring throughout our land will be met with disbelief and shock, as densely populated areas are devastated. The chaos will be exacerbated when we take the wounded to our hospitals only to find them bombed out too! This is only one horrendous scenario that is possible when the suicide bombers commence their terror of all terrors.

If our intelligence organizations do not find these sleepers in time, it will happen. To survive, we must learn how to do painful Grief Work effectively and promptly. Our educators are telling us of the great numbers of our young and tender children who have become psychologically damaged by that appalling, hideous 9/11 attack. And not just those in the New York and DC area have been severely numbed and incapacitated by this atrocity. Fear is a powerful agent of evil. It is at work on many Americans.

My heart goes out to those who lost parents, children, friends and other loved ones. And there is no way to describe the anguish I feel for those who have lost other loved ones since 9/11 to illnesses and/or accidents. Numerous losses so close together do not give anyone time to adjust to their first loss, much less begin the mourning of another significant loss. It can be more than a human being can stand without massive support from friends, Grief Counselors, Doctors and Ministers. I highly recommend that those thus employed, begin training for a lot of grief support to those they serve. I also suggest that we work diligently at building into our populace a powerful hope, the hope we have of our spirits living on even after our bodies have died.

I count myself among those who care deeply for those who have a single loss, and especially those with multiple losses. Some have lost their co-workers, and their jobs simultaneously. The structure that gave their lives a sense of order is gone. Their faith is shaken and their whole family is traumatized. The attack of 9/11 has produced at least one redeeming event; patriotism has been given a new birth.

I did not know a single person who was killed or injured in the 9/11 horrors, but I still felt the symptoms of one who had just suffered a great loss. First, as I watched the second plane slash through the Second Tower, I was shocked by disbelief and confusion. Shortly after, when both towers thunderingly crashed to the ground, I still could not believe that such a catastrophic calamity was happening. I could see it but could not believe that it was really happening.

My feelings followed shortly after that incomprehensible crime against human beings, a hollowness in my abdomen, a tightness in my chest and throat, and a dryness in my mouth, all at once. My body and psyche had simply been concussed.

I scarcely could take it in. Later in the day, I was to feel as though there was a hole in my heart with a cold wind whistling through it. From the studies I have done in the past and my experiences with sudden death in my family, those were familiar sensations. But they came with an even greater force than ever before.

As we meet with losses either from within or from outside our land, we must remember that we will always have something left to work with. We will have some family and some friends, and those we will meet in the midst of our suffering. The greater suffering we survive, the greater our strength will be.

God weeps with us, with the Israelis and YES! with the Palestinians who cannot even imagine what hope is. God will be with us all today, and will be with us through the Valley of the Shadow of Death, and even through death itself.

Fear must not weaken us; it is only a figment of our imagination today. When tragedy comes, then and only then, can we cry, scream, and yes, even cuss, but not ahead of time. One day at a time is all we need to be concerned with as we live in the present. On the other hand we must get prepared for what is coming our way. Remember, Hope abides.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Responses to how you feel now can be posted below, and/or to the 9/11 comment sheet which is found by clicking the patriotic ribbon at the bottom of the sidebar.