Thinking Out Loud

By Gerard Meister

My generation has seen a lot of change and most of it for the better. The biggest change, of course, has come in financial planning. When my wife and I were first married, we could plan only up to Thursday because we never had any money left for Friday, which was, luckily, the day I got paid.

Now there are hosts of financial gurus out there telling us what to do with all the money we scrimped and saved over a lifetime. For example, a couple of days ago one of those financial whiz kids cold-called me, to wit:

Good morning. Is this Mr. Mister or is it Mr. Meester? This is Whitlock...

Ah, that's Mr. Meester, I interrupted factiously.

Oh, sorry about that Mr. Meester. Whitlock Morgan here of Uptick Financial and I'm calling about a special situation that's come up and would like to explain it to you if you have something " available."

Gee, pity you didn't call me a few minutes ago. I just wired a guy who called two hundred thousand - said there was a good situation he was close to and he would let me in on it. Something about raising mohair goats in Colorado, so I'm rather tapped out for the moment. But tell me, is your deal anything similar?

Well, not really, sir. But perhaps, Mr. Meester, I could ……………

Ah, that's Mr. Mister, Mr. Morgan!

Gee, I could have sworn it was Mr. Meester.

I know - not to worry - a lot of people make that mistake. You were saying?

Oh - ah, I was just thinking that maybe I ought to call back at some future date; you seem to have had a busy morning.

Splendid idea, Mr. Morgan, I await your call and thanks for thinking of me.

"Who were you just talking to?" my wife asked as she walked in

"I really don't know," I replied.

"Maybe they'll call back, dear," she said.

"Honey, you could bank on it!"