Alas, To Muse And Ponder

By Denise

People will never cease to amaze me. I have been studying the creature that is called "Human" and it is fascinating. We always want what we don't have and we are always waiting on something. Steve Azar has a song out called "Waiting On Joe" the video to the song has Morgan Freeman doing the prologue to the song. It sums it all up. Instead of directly quoting (you can check it out for yourselves) he says that we are always waiting on that something big to come along to save us, that certain someone that will change our lives for the better or something material that we need and can't live without. As we all know the grass is always greener on the other side.

We spend our lives that way and waste them. We don't see what we have and actually appreciate it. As I have said before and I hate to be repetitive you can always look around and find numerous people that have it much worse than us. I have been looking at these people very intently lately.

One young girl in particular struck a chord in me. She is only nineteen and has a rare blood disease that caused her to lose her hearing totally for about a year. Thank goodness her hearing did come back. She is blind in one eye and headed that way fast on the other. No chance in saving the sight. But do you think she was an angry bitter person about it? No she had a positive outlook. We sat and talked and she said that she had to keep moving on because it was better than the alternative. I wish that I were made from the same ilk as her. A real inspiration and lesson in courage. Didn't whine or cry about it. Wasn't waiting on some miracle cure. She was just moving on with her life and doing a great job of it. She was living it! While I moan about my petty problems and I see this sweet child that has it much worse than I. Felt the urge to kick my self in the behind and mentally did.

We have to have HOPE. The motto to Hell is "Abandon All Hope Here." I refuse to do that no matter how dark and bleak it may look. What is the alternative? And we can't spend our whole lives "Waiting On Joe." No use to wait for someone or something else to save you. It's not going to happen. We all have to save ourselves. We have to decide that we are worth saving and do it. Only we have the ability to accomplish this feat. Mind, Soul and Spirit have to be working together. In that equation there has to be hope for another day.

There is nothing that we can do about the past. Save the good memories and the lessons learned from the bad times and move on. We can't live in the future. It might never come. Live in the here and now. The moment. Wrench every drop of joy out of it that we can. Make them take the moment away from you kicking and screaming. There are five basic human emotions but my favorite has to be Joy. It is different for everyone but make the most of it when you find it and suckle all of the nectar from it that is possible. I am hitting the cliché's and I am sorry.

We all do have to keep moving on. In our minds, physically and spiritually motion creates energy. Energy, you know the life force within us. Without motion we give up and sit down and die. The regrets alone will kill you. A close friend of mine was telling me about a visit to the Doctor and he had been asked if he had any regrets. He told the Doctor that he had only one, "Hindsight." Hung the Doctor up. Didn't know what to say to that. Thought it was a great answer personally. What value does hindsight provide for us? Like beating your head up against a brick wall all it does is hurt you and it serves you no purpose. The 'what could have been' is just that - the past tense.

Material things are just that. Material. You can collect a myriad of things. But in the end can you take them with you? I would rather collect love and the human emotion Joy. Hoarding it up, I guess would be considered gluttony, but I would hope in a good way. These are the things that I believe that we can take with us when we are gone. They are embedded in our spirit. Laughter is the greatest thing of all. If you can't laugh hysterically about the most morbid things then something is wrong. Everything in life can have a lighter side to it. Just have to be bold enough to find something funny in it.

Why do we collect things? Most of the time it is to impress other people. Why not just impress yourself? Do they not usually just sit on a shelf collecting dust? I am guilty of this myself. Not doing anyone any good but for me to look at them and say, yes, I own that. But do we ever truly own anything? I don't think so. We are all just borrowing the material things in this life. They will be passed on to other people or end up in a thrift store. As you have guessed I have books everywhere. I have read most of them but I cannot bear to part with them. Like an old friend that you might want to revisit. Just comforts you knowing that they are there. But it is not my collection they are just borrowed. The collections will move on just like the rest of life. It doesn't stop when we are gone. As it has been said "Time Stops For No Man" and it is true.

But we do stop our lives for other human beings. We sit and wait for them to call or come around to make our lives better. It usually doesn't happen and besides being motionless we are also miserable and consider ourselves failures for not being capable of making them want and love us. And let me tell you that is impossible. The human heart does work separately from the brain. You can know in your mind that you are being the biggest fool on this earth but still not be capable of commanding your heart to stop wanting that person. I have learned to accept all of this about myself. I freely admit that I am an idiot.

The idea of our shadow self fascinates me. Something that I have picked up from my mentor. That what we despise in another is what we really feel or how we act and once you recognize that and accept the blame you can be a whole person. You have to learn to incorporate the two and then they can coexist. This is total self-examination and it makes you look at yourself for who you are and you do have to be able to see your shadow self. It is scary but it is well worth the while. Takes a while to get the whole picture of yourself. If you need any more info on this subject just post me and I will send you a link to one of the best sites on the subject. I am still studying it myself. Just trying to keep my mind moving and sharp.

Just suffice it to say that we cannot count on another person to make us whole or happy. That job is left to us. For only we know who we are. You can never totally know another person. Never! There is always something they are holding back or hiding within them. Think about it. Do you ever honestly reveal your whole self to another person? On the inside we can be very ugly and we all have skeletons in our closets. And yes we do have to have down periods to regenerate ourselves but then we have to get back up and start moving again. We can't just sit and "Wait On Joe." We do have to keep moving on!

Just something to think about. Until next time.

Denise

"After all, tomorrow is another day."
Margaret Mitchell 1900-1949