Turn of the Century
A pbobby Provocation
"For many years, I have wondered if I would live to see the year 2000. So many chances to die or be killed have been weathered: Scarlet fever with all the associated hallucinations; a close call with a copperhead at age five; an accident with a well drilling rig at age five; and two near-drownings at age seven. In adulthood: a serious fight with typhus; a bullet slamming into the tree just above my head on a deer hunt; two serious auto accidents with head injuries; and heart surgery at age sixty-one.
The physical dangers to my life seem so trivial when viewed alongside my emotional and spiritual battles fought mostly in a solitary fashion through my 65 years."
Today, January 20, 2003, I have been browsing through my uncategorized Word Documents and fragments thereof, and found the above remembrances. Time seems to be flashing by at warp speed and shows no indication of decelerating. I will be 69 in a couple of months and wondering how these events seem so recent. It's as though all of my past remembrances have merged into one amazing, multifarious present that is ever changing, vibrant and always surprising.
If I should die this moment, I will have had more than my share of life's wonderments. I am blessed with one wife, two brothers, seven children, fourteen Grandchildren (Number fifteen is still in his/her private womb) and two Great Grandchildren. I can't bring myself to count up my nieces, great nieces, nephews and great nephews, and all of the in-laws of the preceding.
One of my brothers, two of my children and one of my grandchildren are dead.
It's not possible for me to tell the stories of each. It would take a forest or two just to make the paper for them to be printed upon. My own personal experiences would take volumes to record as well. My careers have been many, not the least of which is my six-year, three-children college education.
My early jobs included lawn mowing, dipping ice cream at Mrs. Lowe's Deli, delivery and maintenance work in a dry cleaning plant, core-making in a foundry, laboring through concrete construction projects, making copper tubing (draw bench operator) at Lewin Metals, Ministering at three Baptist churches, teaching math and chemistry at two high schools while driving a school bus and coaching basketball.
I spent three years as a technical writer at LTV, ten years in my own printing and advertising business, one year designing and selling custom fifth-wheel trailers with dual functions (living quarters/business sections). I also spent alternate weekends and evenings on call for the Family Service and John Peter Smith Hospital Suicide Hotline.
Having been a pastor and a Licensed Chemical Dependence Counseling Intern was my experience that qualified for this work. Needless to say, my life has been exciting and variegated (happy, boring, sad and glorious.
From 1975 to this present day I have been a Life Insurance agent for Northwestern Mutual Life Insurance Company. Mixed in with all these employments have been my hobbies of farming, playing basketball and baseball, golfing and writing since 1979. I know I must have forgotten some of the other major endeavors in my life except my eighteen-month bachelorhood.
I have lived through World War II as a child, the Korean War, the Viet Nam War, and the war with Iraq, which is most likely to resume before this Provocation is published.
So what's the point? Certainly not to boast over my doings, but to provoke you to pause and look back into past years of your life to see how full they have been of accomplishments and experiences of love, disappointments, losses, and serendipitous events. Do you remember your first hugs and dangerous excursions that have been a part of your life?
Most likely you will find myriad events and activities just below your present conscious level. I have found that classifying the good and the bad of life is of no value. No mathematical analyses will add to the meaning of life today; only the totality of so much living in our short lives will be your amazement. Even though we know that we have spent hours and days loafing, we will find that that time was readying us for our next meaningful accomplishment or unsuccessful attempt that has made you, YOU. You will find many more special events, happenings, and great stories hidden away in your mind and soul than you ever dreamed possible.
I also want to provoke you into trying to compare your beliefs and values as they have evolved down through the years. Mine have changed from simple acceptance to tough reality testing of them.
I have come a long way, Baby, from my earliest beliefs and my daily plowing of new ground without fear of Divine Retribution. God gave us minds that work, especially when we can get some of the hurdles behind us. Sometimes it is scary and yet it's worth it to make your way through what others have taught you to really believe.
It's tough to admit that I have been foolhardy many more times than I have been wise. Yet, this will not stop me from doubting my past answers and Dancing with New Ideas.
January 20, 2003
